Donna Fielder

What this material girl wanted to do, mostly, was shop. And since the malls are already in full Christmas frenzy, I made my lengthy list and wore out every store in town.

So on this Thanksgiving weekend, a gift reminder with every name crossed off tops the list of things I am most thankful for.

Every year at this time I express my gratitude for the good things that have come my way. It’s nice to pause in my endless whining about traffic, roundabouts, unpleasing people and aggravating circumstances beyond my control and just give thanks.

So I’m glad I’m all shopped out. Forget the fact that I could have paid much less if I had waited for the sales. I know I’m missing all that wonderful piped-in holiday music, and catching up on the lives of people I know while waiting in lines to check out, and fighting my way to the counter with my coupon, only to learn it isn’t good for clothing, jewelry, handbags or housewares.

I’ll get over it.

Another thing I’m thankful for this year is fall.

We’re having it for a change. The days are crisp and glorious. The trees are bright with orange and red and yellow leaves. The nights are nearly cool enough for a fire if you crank down the air conditioning.

We have four seasons in Texas, just like everybody else. That is not to say they are of equal duration or that some of them don’t come around more than once a year.

Sometimes we have a fall that lasts three days, usually sometime in October. The leaves turn a nasty brown, plummet from the trees and smother the St. Augustine.

Fall comes between summer No. 1 and summer No. 2, sort of surrounding and overwhelming autumn along the way.

We have winter, beginning in February and consisting of one sleet storm that shuts down the interstate, closes schools and sends half the vehicular population to the shop for body work.

Texans don’t know how to drive on ice, transplanted Mainers and Mainettes say.

It’s hard to practice steering into a skid on melting asphalt.

Then there is spring, heralded in bold black letters marching across the bottom of our television screens. “Tornado watch!” it’s called.

We spend this season huddled in front of the TV with our family photos, homeowner’s deeds and pets piled in the bathtub under a mattress, listening to Greg Fields predict there will be no tomorrow.

Hellish weather is Mother Nature’s way of trying to drive all those newbies out of Texas. It isn’t working.

But age is mellowing me and I’m becoming more tolerant of those who hail from north of the Red River. I’m thankful for that.

I’m thankful for the upcoming Christmas lighting festival because it brings us Brave Combo. I can make a fool of myself doing the chicken dance because everybody else is too busy trying to remember whether to clap or flap their fingers to capture me in their cellphone cameras.

I’m thankful for Roosters and the green tomato bacon burger.

I’m glad that political season is over and we’re about to embark on a new, bipartisan happy time when everyone gets his fair share and world leaders hold hands and sing “Kum Ba Yah.” (Picture me flashing a peace sign with my fingers here.)

I’m thankful that Starbuck the deer has so far made it unscathed through hunting season. That wily old buck has had a couple of close calls, he admitted, so he’s catching a flight to the Bahamas for the holidays.

I’m grateful I can still get Mr. Chopsticks cashew chicken but I wish I could still get it in the building with the vine growing out of the wall.

I’m thankful nobody has to know how to cut up a chicken anymore. I’m glad that chickens now hatch from the egg right into those foam containers segregated into legs, “fingers,” “tenders” and of course, buffalo wings.

I’m happy that Christi did not bring her fabled Pumpkin Dee-Light to Thanksgiving dinner this year.

And in this cheerful, mellow frame of mind, I’m thankful for Bob Clifton. Every city has its cranks, but none with the sheer entertainment value Clifton gives us with his “I’m smarter than everybody” attitude.

I’m most thankful, however, that there’s only one of him.

DONNA FIELDER can be reached at 940-566-6885. Her e-mail address is dfielder@dentonrc.com.